The Wrap-Up

It was pointed out to me that I never posted a final entry of my swimming blog.  Things got so hectic when we got home from vacation that I didn't have time to write.  So here is the wrap up!

 I did go snorkeling in Hawaii and it was fantastic!  I had some scary moments in the beginning because snorkeling in a warm therapy pool in Columbus, Ohio is a little different then swimming in the Pacific Ocean. It was hard for me to get into the water and to get the rented mask to fit properly.  I had a small panic attack when a wave hit me and I fell down. However, I did calm down and put the fins and mask on for the most amazing adventure.  The coral reefs were beautiful and I was proud of myself for doing it.  I have a picture of a lifetime where I am underwater and waving to the camera.  I am getting a print of the picture to put on my dresser to remind myself that I did overcome a great obstacle and I am a lot stronger than I thought.  I am proud of myself and I want to have that reminder on a normal weekday when I am getting ready for work and feeling down about my life.

The beautiful house we stayed at in Hawaii had a pool.  Dan took some video of me swimming in the pool and I must say it was very disappointing.  I look uncomfortable.  It looks like I am fighting with the water, slapping and struggling.  It wasn’t pretty.  Clearly I have a long way to go before I become the graceful and comfortable swimmer that I thought I was in my mind.  I have 4 lessons left at The McConnell Center that I can use at any time.  To be honest it is going to take more than 4 lessons to make me a “true swimmer”.  I know this now, and I might start again but I will wait until spring or summer when it is warm.  The thought of putting a swimsuit on in the middle of winter is more than I can bear.

 To tell you the truth I have other goals at the moment that I would need to tackle. First and foremost, I need to pay attention to my health and diet.  I am a person who is only really able to concentrate on one thing at a time, it is a flaw but I am aware of it.  When faced with too many “irons in the fire” I concentrate on the hottest poker at the moment and the status of my weight and health is red hot. I have to lose 25 lbs and focus on heart health and my blood pressure as indicated by my new thirty something young doctor.  She is great, but she has laid down the law for me.  I have to reduce alcohol, fat, cholesterol, stress, carbohydrates, and anything good and/or fun.  I may blog about it but not sure.  I don’t even know what I would call it:  “Desperate for chocolate”, “Fat and Fun in the mid-forties”, “Losing pounds and lovin’ it”.  Damn, all of these titles sound horrible.  I will have to keep thinking. 

Thanks so much for reading about my adventures in learning to swim and thanks so much for all the kind support.  

Erin

  

Well, my swimming lessons are coming to an end.  I only have 1 more session which is hard for me to believe.  I am really going to miss my weekly visit to the pool and seeing Sal and Gladys and all the other senior citizens.   

 

Last week I was able to try a snorkel mask and fins in the pool.  I wasn’t sure I was going to be able to do it because I am claustrophobic, but it was not bad at all!  My instructor fitted me with a children’s mask because my face is so small (yeah it is the only thing small on my body) along with breathing tube thingy and fins.  It was great fun. I loved it.  I thought, “to hell with swimming lessons let me just cruise around the pool doing this for the whole class”.  I haven’t decided whether I will buy my own gear or just rent it in Hawaii.  I would like to have my own but it would also be a pain to try and pack and when am I going to use it here in Ohio? What am I going to do, snorkel in Buckeye Lake? 

BIG NEWS: I am going to have to move to the bigger lap pool next week because the therapy pool is too small for me.  I am able to make it to one side to the other without much effort.  Patty wants me to practice going a longer distance.   This will be the first time in my swimming history that I have progressed to the next level.  I have waited my whole life to be bumped up to the “big kids” pool.  I did it!  I will have my final lesson wrap up next week. 

 Next:  Graduation  

Lesson 4

I arrived 1/2 hour early for my lesson so that I could practice only to find that there was a senior citizen water aerobics class taking up about 3/4 of the pool. There was a small sliver of unoccupied space at the deep end so I jumped in and started to practice my freestyle and my back stroke. As I was swimming back and forth "Mrs. Kravitz" was bobbing on a floating noodle while doing her arm circles and drifting into my small and limited area. I was able to swim around her but while doing the backstroke I was not able to see her and came close to hitting her with my arm. I gave my apologies but she seemed rather offended that she would have to share the pool. I wasn't really planning on getting into a Jet vs. Shark turf war with a senior citizen, but "When you're a Jet, you're a Jet all the way.....". I kept swimming and ignored her.  I thought if I could go really fast past her maybe I could knock “Gladys” off her noodle with the strength of my wake. I wanted to be respectful but… she started it! I must have frightened her with my unruly backstroke and arms whipping about because she moved to safer waters after giving me the evil eye.  Only I could make swimming a contact sport and set off a gang war between the swimmers and the senior citizen aerobic-sizers.  Oy- vey.   

Maybe I was tired or maybe my impending rumble with “Gladys” had me distracted, but it was a struggle to stay focused and concentrate on swimming.  I just wasn’t feeling it.  It could have been the several glasses of champagne and the 5 lb pumpkin spice cake my husband and I enjoyed the night before for his birthday that left me in a fog and feeling low energy.  I couldn’t wait for the lesson to be over and to get out of the pool.

I am still not able to get the rhythm of the strokes right and get winded very easily because as my instructor Patty pointed out to me; I am not breathing correctly and it is very frustrating for both her and me.  I only have a few more lessons left.  I am worried that I am not progressing enough which is causing some stress.  I would like to be able to swim a full lap without stopping.  I have got a long way to go. 

On a side note:  Patty coaches a 5 and 6 year old swimming relay team. (I bet they can do the pull, breath, kick combo with no problem, but I can stay up  as late as I want on school nights so I win!)  She thought it would be cute to get the girls vintage swimming caps like mine.  She asked where I got it and I gave her the name of the company. It appears that my swim cap is a hit with both the old and young. So even if I didn’t have a spectacular lesson at least I helped the children be stylish.  It is after all always about helping the children. 

Next week:  Snorkeling!   

Lesson 3

I was all ready for my lesson.  I had watched YouTube videos of the breaststroke and studied the “pull, breath, kick, glide" process.  I even arrived early so I would have time to practice.  Evidently my new nose clip was too tight because 15 minutes into the lesson I got a nosebleed and had to get out of the pool, so my third session was cut short.  I was disappointed because I had all my new accoutrements and really wanted to use them.     

A couple of years ago my husband Dan and I decided that we needed more exercise and we wanted to find something we could do together so we signed up for tennis lessons through our local Parks and Recreation. These lessons were not very intense, more of a "Tennis 101" class. Dan and I went to the local sports store and proceeded to buy about $500.00 worth of "stuff". We had to have new rackets, duffel bags, tennis balls, sweat bands, sports sunglasses, shirts, shorts, special wicking socks and of course new shoes. Our passion for tennis lasted one summer and I have 7 tennis skirts and tops which I haven't worn since and a ridiculous pair of sports sunglasses with yellow lenses. (What was I thinking?) 

 

Last year I decided to start taking Zumba classes which needs a completely different wardrobe from tennis. I purchased several shirts, pants, headbands and socks. I needed a different type of shoe which is more of a dancing shoe and of course a new bag to put it all into because my tennis bag is just too "tennis-y". I still take Zumba classes every week so I count these purchases as investments. I use these items regularly, but I am always on the look-out for something new to add to my workout wardrobe.

This year the activity is swimming. I have had only 3 lessons but staying true to form I have already purchased 2 new swim suits, Speedo goggles, non-fog cleaner/solution for the goggles, a nose clip, 4 swimming caps (2 are vintage and have flowers stuck to the side), shower shoes, a new travel kit to be used specifically for the locker room, and a track suit. Noticing a pattern here? Dan is worried that I am going to want to take horseback riding lessons next. The problem is that our backyard isn't big enough to board a horse and our city has some pesky ordinances regarding farm animals. I guess I will just buy the cool riding boots.

Lesson # 2

My first lesson was about getting into the water and overcoming the fear I had built up in my head for over 40 years.  Lesson two was actually about SWIMMING, which turned out to be more complicated than I had expected. 

I quickly remembered why I quit piano lessons, flute lessons, and ski lessons….because it takes practice and I don’t have the patience for practice.   I want to be able to do it right out of the gate and be awesome at it.    

My instructor, Patty, started the lesson with showing me the breast stroke.  There is a rhythm and synchronization to the breast stroke; arms, legs, and breathing all working together to propel you forward in the water.  She showed me what to do and made it look really easy as she glided through the water with little effort.   I must admit I thought, “Piece of Cake!”; “It doesn’t look so tough.”  I pushed off the wall put my face in the water but my arms, legs, and lungs decided not to work together but to do their own thing.  I was not moving forward but merely staying in one place.   I forgot a very important aspect of the stroke and that was to breathe.   I panicked and took in a huge gulp of water.  I quickly stood-up coughing, and wheezing trying to catch my breath. Yuck, pool water… I must say, I don’t really enjoy it. 

Patty came over and gave me some more instruction which to be honest went in one ear and out the other since I was concentrating on the chlorine burning in my lungs and the anxiety that was starting to rise in the middle of my stomach.  She told me about the physics behind the stroke and why the way I was doing it wasn’t propelling me forward and that my kick wasn’t effective because I was not doing it correctly.  “Do it again”, she said, just like my childhood piano teacher would bark at me.  The nice sweet little old lady who had been so supportive and kind last week was replaced with a no-nonsense instructor who is clearly hell bent on either drowning me, or making sure I am successful.    Her transformation to task master happened so fast and I wasn’t ready for it.  I thought about faking a drowning episode so that maybe I could go back to lesson 1 where everything was happy and nice, but I am on a schedule and leave for Hawaii in several weeks so there is no time for regression.

 

Next was the back stroke.  It was a little easier for me but not by much.  At least my face was out of the water except for those few times when I didn’t have my head back far enough and  began to sink which caused me to drink more pool water.    She showed me how to roll from one side of the other while bringing my arm up and out of the water.  The kick for the back stroke is different than the frog-kick of the breast stroke (which I wasn’t able to do either).  Patty yelled, “POINT YOUR TOES!”  My legs felt like weights and I was starting to get winded. I had to stand up in the middle of the pool because I didn’t have enough strength to keep going.  The realization started to set in that this is going to be a lot more difficult than just getting over the fear of the water.  It was going to take true effort if I was going to learn to do it correctly, and damn I hate effort.

 

After my first lesson I was so excited, pumped, and ready to take on the world.  I felt I had conquered something huge and I was on an adrenaline high.  After this second lesson my throat was burning from drinking so much chlorine water, my hips hurt from all the kicking, and my ego was damaged because I thought I would do much better.  I guess it was the universe’s lesson; a reminder that it wasn’t going to be easy and I will have to practice and keep pushing forward to succeed.   

I can’t play the piano, flute, or ski because I gave up when it didn’t come easy to me.  Floating is easy, but what fun is there in just staying in one place?  I want to be able to swim, and if I drink pool water at least it will be from the deep end.    

 

 

 

 

Lesson # 1

I am not going to lie, there were some tears on Sunday as I was getting ready for my swim lesson.  I just became overwhelmed at what I was about to do. I thought to myself; forget it, I don’t want to do this.  As I sat on the edge of my bed all teary eyed, Dan said, “You have come this far just keep getting ready.”  He started to sing “Eye of the Tiger” to me which made me laugh because Dan isn’t one who just breaks out into song.  It was enough to break the tension  and get me into the car. 

The facility where I am taking my lessons is pretty impressive.  It is mostly used for patients who are rehabbing from surgeries, heart attacks, strokes, etc.  It is a very calm quiet environment with warm lighting.  I checked in and went to the women’s locker room which looks like a spa.  My hands were shaking as I put my items in the locker.  I found my way to the pool and sat on the bench as I was told to do and wait for my instructor, Patty. 

There was a senior citizen aqua-aerobic class just finishing up and they were doing their cool-down exercises.  A sweet faced woman with silver hair turned around and said, “Are you Erin?” "I am Patty I will be with you in a minute."  I took a couple of deep breaths.  She said, “You can get into the pool whenever you are ready”.  

Here it was….time to get into the water…..to quit now would be embarrassing with all those senior citizens staring at me.   I got in and the water was like bath water.   After the aerobic class cleared-out it was just Patty and I and an older gentlemen doing rehab exercises while floating on a noodle.  I will call him Salvador, Sal for short. He probably thought to himself “What is this woman afraid of? I faced Germans in WWII and didn’t think anything of it and she is afraid to put her face in the water?”

Patty asked me about my swimming history and my fear of water.  She told me about herself and that she has been teaching swimming for 30 years and is a retired Physics teacher.  She has a very calming demeanor and I was instantly at ease with her.  As we were talking I realized that she had moved me to the middle of the pool- very clever.  She said, “Ok, I am going to put these goggles on you”.  I instantly felt my body get tense. She reassured me that we would go at my pace, but she needed to see where I was in terms of being comfortable in the water.  She suggested that we start with just going underwater and opening my eyes.  “Ummmmmm, Ok”, I said reluctantly.  I asked if I could hold my nose and she said I could do whatever I wanted to do.  I held my nose went under the water waited for a second or two and slowly opened my eyes.  And what did I see? ; Sal’s little old man legs treading water…It was awesome.  I had never been able to see underwater before because I would never open my eyes, but with the goggles it was easy.  She had me do it a couple more times.  She asked if I could float and I told her I used to be able to float for a bit when I was a kid but I wasn’t sure that was still the case.  She told me to try and float on my front and to maybe try and kick too.  I took a huge deep breath, still wearing the goggles, put my face in the water, pushed off the wall and proceeded to float and kick from ONE SIDE OF THE POOL TO THE OTHER!  When I touched the wall I popped up and was so excited.  I think I yelled “NO WAY!!”  I was so surprised at what I had just done, it was unbelievable.  I told Patty, that I have never ever been able to do that- ever.  The adrenaline was pumping through my body and I was shaking.  I honestly was in shock. 

My first class was over and it was successful!  I had accomplished something big by just putting my face in the water and “swimming” a few yards.    I had taken the first step and I didn’t die.  It is kind of like the first day of Jr. High; you are so excited that you survived it but at some point you realize that you have to do it all again tomorrow.  My next lesson is this Friday.  I have to do some shopping at a specialty store for a pair of my own goggles and maybe a jazzy swim cap to match my suit.  After all, I can never pass the chance to accessorize. 

I am officially now a self appointed “guppy”, which is one level up from “terrified woman at the edge of the pool”.   

Jumping In

Welcome to my personal journey from non-swimmer to swimmer, or at least to a person who won't sink to the bottom of the pool.

My first private adult swim lesson is on Sunday October 7th and to say I am nervous might not quite describe the amount of anxiety I have about this journey.

I have had a fear of water since I can remember.  My parents gave me every single swimming lesson they could find and none of them "stuck". I would wear down the instructors refusing to put my face in the water. They would throw rubber rings to get me to go to the bottom of the pool and I would just shake my head "No". They tried everything; the promise of candy, stickers, ribbons, but I wouldn't budge. The threat of drowning wasn't worth a watermelon Jolly Rancher or a "You are a Star" sticker. At some point they would give up and tell me to go sit on a deck chair and wait for my Mom to pick me up. Erin: 1 Swim Instructor: 0.

As I got older there was a certain amount of shame attached to not being able to swim, but it was not enough to get me to try and swim.  Friends and younger siblings weren’t happy always having to stay in the shallow end with me and they left me for deeper waters. It wasn't any fun being alone at the safe end of the pool and so I gave up trying to learn to swim.

During my teenage years I was happy to just sit poolside and soak up the rays and possible melanoma rather than swim in the pool.  I was young and didn’t realize I should have been more fearful of developing cancer rather than learning to doggie paddle.

At some point I made a silent deal with God that if I didn’t put myself in dangerous situations involving water like para-sailing, skiing, or taking a riverboat dinner cruise, he didn’t let my car plunge off of a bridge into a creek in some freak accident.  (It has worked out thus far.) 

Now I am middle-aged and I am looking back on things that I have missed.  I realized I have regrets about not being able to swim and so I decided that I would consider learning to swim.  It took me a couple of years to gain enough courage, but when a trip to Hawaii came into my future I figured it was time. My husband wants to snorkel during the trip and I would like to be able to go with him. I don’t want to miss anything because of my fear. 

So here I am. On Sunday I will literally be standing at the edge of the pool ready to jump in and face my phobia of water.  Will I sink or swim?   I am hoping for “swim” and I hope the instructor has plenty of stickers and Jolly Ranchers because I am really going to try, but just in case I made sure my 69 year old mother is available to pick me up early.      

Next: The First Lesson